• Ishani Shah-Verdia

Let's raise self-confident children!

Updated: Jun 15, 2020



Did you observe how Raedita, 4.5 years, is observing and learning from Cosimo, 5.5 years? Cosimo is teaching her how to walk safely on the periphery of the wall.

One of the most frequently asked question to Sahaj is, “What if Sahaj children meet children from other schools and feel inferior?” While I do understand the place from which parents ask this question, I invite parents to imagine through this blog, a new world where children are raised to be secure adults. Well, this feeling of inferiority exists in adults since most of us as children were made to feel incomplete and unworthy, and had been unaccepted for who we were either subtly or in a more straightforward style. When children are wholeheartedly accepted, loved and seen for who they are, the feeling of inferiority or insecurity doesn’t breed in them.

If children need to learn something that they don't know, children will ask for help and learn it. For instance, a few days later, while children were playing hide and seek, Cosimo didn't know how to count and he was taking help from Raedita to learn counting. Raedita was teaching him. A feeling of insecurity was not present in Cosimo, for neither his parents nor his educators have ever made him feel incompetent. While playing hide and seek, Raedita was getting confused in counting after number 13.

She asked for help from me and that is how a cooperative work culture operates, even in workplaces.

For instance, if you see someone cook well, wouldn’t you ask for the recipe or request to teach the technique? If you hear your friend play piano beautifully, a desire is born in you, “How I wish, I could play the piano so perfectly.” If you are a self-confident and/ or a secure person, you will either observe your friend and self-learn or show the courage to ask for help or learn it from a teacher or online sources. However, an insecure person might feel inferior or jealous and operate from this place. At workplaces, do co-workers not learn from each other? At home, do family members not learn from one another? Homes where members are not learning from one another and are steeped in a feeling of insecurity or the complexes of superiority/ inferiority often fall apart. The genesis to raising self-confident and secure adults lies in the formative years of a human being’s life and it is the self-confident and secure adults of the future who will create a positive ripple effect in home, government offices and work environments.

Dale Halaway said these profound words,

“Hurt people, hurt people
Truly healed people no longer hurt others.”

Being parents and teachers to young children have presented us with an unique opportunity to let go of our insecurities and gift the best version of ourselves to our children. Wouldn't this be the most precious present that we could ever give our children?



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